The kids are getting so big, so fast. I cannot believe it. It blows my mind. It puts things into perspective.
Scarlett is going to KINDERGARTEN. That's big kid school. Riding a bus by herself and spending the ENTIRE DAY with someone who isn't family. She is thrilled. I am somewhere between thrilled for her and terrified. Terrified of her being away all day (and let's face it, also a bit thrilled). Terrified of her not making friends, or of her making the wrong kind of friends. Terrified that she wont like it (though, judging by her nursery school experience, that will not be the case).
She has her back pack, lunch box, multiple drink and food containers. We ordered personalized labels for her. She is set. I am not. How has it been four years already? This will make Max's inevitable school journey creep up on me that much sooner.
Scarlett loves soccer and dance class. She has grown so much this summer. Watching her develop socially and learn to speak up for herself has been a remarkable thing. Watching friendships develop, and hearing her reasoning for choosing her friends, shows what a tough cookie she will grow up to be. Scarlett I see as a leader. She is head strong, stubborn, strong-willed. She is also a bit of a perfectionist and loves to please the role models in her life. She is an amazing big sister and thinks of herself as Max's babysitter (which is funny seeing as she has never had a babysitter). She loves playing dress up and role playing. If she is in her play kitchen, her name is Gabriella. She calls her babies "sweetheart" and snuggles them tight. She makes up songs and jokes and talks nonstop from the moment she wakes up until she falls asleep. She is affectionate and sweet. That is, when the tantrum threes aren't taking over. Please, PLEASE let these tantrum threes be over. She is four now. Fantastic Fours right? Please?
My Max. He is such a trooper. He is ROCKING his AFOs. He can run, dance, climb and has bouncing (jumping) mastered. He is so smart and funny. He is the sweetest little man...except for when it is time to sleep. At bed time (nap time, rest time...) he is a demon spawn. This kid would snuggle 24-7. I either love it or cringe because of it. Boy are definitely, 100%, different from girls. I heard the warnings, but didn't actually believe it. He is either running around like a monkey on speed, or wants to snuggle in so close that we feel like one person.
He loves helping. He sweeps, dusts, vacuums, puts things in the garbage, wipes up the many spills we encounter daily, and his favourite, feeds the dog. Gordy is bound to weigh 100 pounds soon at the rate Max feeds him treats.
He is so different. At this age, his sister was 100% obsessed with all things Baby Signing Time. She could sign along with the first two DVDs easily by this age. Max doesn't care. She LOVED Toy Story. Max doesn't care. He wants to be running, and climbing, and getting into EVERYTHING...or he wants to be snuggled in close and asleep. I can never put him down and trust he will be there in 2 minutes (let's face it, 2 seconds is asking a lot). I would never have the fireplace on and trust him to stay away, or anything breakable within reach of his chubby little fingers. He is stubborn and strong willed (which I am sure is why he is rocking those leg braces so well- he is a determined boy). He is also unbelievably sweet and loving. He gives hugs and kisses all the time. He hands out giggles and smiles to anyone who approaches him. He gets dragged everywhere and is just happy to be a part of the outing.
I feel like I missed his first year though. That, between all the appointments and things going on with Scarlett, I missed his babydom because he is now a toddler. He has a mind of his own. Words of his own. Places to go. Luckily for me (or unluckily depending on the night), with mama is still his favourite place to be.
Wednesday, 13 August 2014
Saturday, 14 June 2014
Where We are Now
I cannot believe it has been a year since I last posted. It has been unbelievably busy for us. I will start with Miss S, because, believe it or not, her story is shorter.
Miss S started nursery school this year and just blossomed. We enrolled her in dance class (twice) and now soccer, and she is a totally different kid.
She has changed so much. Suddenly she is her own little (and very opinionated) person. She loves her friends and her teachers, and she is beyond excited to go to kindergarten in the fall.
She can read easy books, write her name, and can write many other words (with prompts). She knows her numbers, shapes and colours...she is so bright. I am so proud of her.
Except for her new found attitude. That I could do without.
People talked about the "terrible twos" and I laughed. I had a lovely two year old! She was so easy!
Once 3 1/2 hit, she became a different child. Opinionated (stubborn) is being kind. She can be a royal pain sometimes. I can only hope that as we get closer to four, that these "trying threes" (they should be the tequila threes, as in you need tequila to deal).
She loves her family and friends. She is all about spending time outdoors and keeping busy. She LOVES Frozen, anything Princess, Doc McStuffins and Sherif Callie.
She loves to read and write and learn about the world.
When she is not driving me up the wall, she is amazing me. She is a fabulous big sister (and a bit of a pain for a little sister) and I cannot wait to see what kindergarten has in store for her.
Mr M is the reason my posts have been few and far between.
For one, he has only been sleeping through the night for about a week. And he isn't really sleeping through most nights, but only having a brief waking where I do not have to nurse or rock him (but do have to sit in the room), is WAY better than the 14m prior to this breakthrough. He is not happy about it. Too bad for him.
He and I have also been diagnosed with Neurofibromatosis type 1(NF), which is a genetic and neurological disorder which causes tumours to grow on the nerves. It can be very serious, or so mild you go undiagnosed. It can be a sporadic mutation, which happened to me, or it can be genetically passed down via a parent, which happened to M.
I had no idea I had this condition until M was sent to a paediatrician for the bowing in his left tibia. I had requested a second opinion for our family doctor, was sent to a paediatrician, who took one look at him and sent us to Sick Kids.
3 weeks later we went to Sick Kids. They took one look and said, "Yes, we have to be concerned about this leg, and yes, you need the NF clinic."
2 weeks later (on the evening of S' nursery school Christmas Concert which I have yet to receive photos or videos of), my mom, M and I found ourselves back at Sick Kids in the NF Clinic where we found that M did indeed have NF, and I should get myself into an adult clinic ASAP. ASAP for adults means just last week.
SO, M has had special eye exams, countless doctor's appointments, and finally, physio/occupational therapy, who rushed his leg braces. I am forever grateful for his physiotherapist for getting the ball rolling for us, because Sick Kids had a loong wait time and he has been wonderful with M.
He isn't quite walking yet, but he is getting there. It was hard for him to adjust to socks, braces and shoes all at once, but Mr M is a determined little (big) fellow, and he will get there. He is thisclose. So close. Another month and I will be wondering why I was ever worried about it.
Except that I am always worried. NF can be linked to pseudarthritis, scoliosis and a whole whack of other things, but with his bowed little legs, I worry about what a break could mean for him; and we were warned that a break will likely happen at some point, and he will need surgery then...so let's hope it happens later rather than sooner. OR, we could just hope it doesn't happen at all.
It is not all bad. We are trying to remain optimistic, because we can't raise our son to live in fear or be embarrassed by something out of his control. We tell anyone who asks, regardless of age, why he wears the braces and what they do. Note to parents, it is absolutely OK if your child asks about his legs and braces. It is not something we are ashamed of, and we hope M wont be ashamed of them either. Let your child ask questions, feel free to ask them yourself. Just be prepared for an education about NF and what it causes, because we have even met people in the healthcare profession not familiar with NF and that is not right.
1 in 3,500 babies will be born with NF. It doesn't matter gender or race, NF isn't discriminatory.
Up to 50% of children with NF will have some sort of learning disability or be on the ASD spectrum.
Signs of NF include cafe au lait spots, neurofibromas (little raised tumours/bumps), bowing of the tibia (leg).
It can cause scoliosis, pseudoarthritis, tumours on the eyes.
Parents with NF have a 50% chance of passing it on. S does not have it, M does.
Just a little education. And to be clear, I went 31 years without knowing I had NF. M has the cafe au laits and a bowed tibia (though he wears braces on both legs for a variety of reasons- minor bowing of the right tibia and to better stabilize him as he learns to walk to be the main ones). We can hope that he, like me, will live a normal, healthy life. We are getting genetic testing done so we have as much information as we can, because, quite frankly, there is not enough information out there.
Well, it's late, and I have to curl up with a cup of tea. It feels good writing this out. We've been so busy that I just need to sit and think at the computer sometimes.
No worries, I have posts on our African Adventure and the many milestones of the kiddos to share after we get through Nursery School Graduation, Grade Eight Graduation and a whole slew of parties, weddings and general summer business.
Miss S started nursery school this year and just blossomed. We enrolled her in dance class (twice) and now soccer, and she is a totally different kid.
She has changed so much. Suddenly she is her own little (and very opinionated) person. She loves her friends and her teachers, and she is beyond excited to go to kindergarten in the fall.
She can read easy books, write her name, and can write many other words (with prompts). She knows her numbers, shapes and colours...she is so bright. I am so proud of her.
Except for her new found attitude. That I could do without.
People talked about the "terrible twos" and I laughed. I had a lovely two year old! She was so easy!
Once 3 1/2 hit, she became a different child. Opinionated (stubborn) is being kind. She can be a royal pain sometimes. I can only hope that as we get closer to four, that these "trying threes" (they should be the tequila threes, as in you need tequila to deal).
She loves her family and friends. She is all about spending time outdoors and keeping busy. She LOVES Frozen, anything Princess, Doc McStuffins and Sherif Callie.
She loves to read and write and learn about the world.
When she is not driving me up the wall, she is amazing me. She is a fabulous big sister (and a bit of a pain for a little sister) and I cannot wait to see what kindergarten has in store for her.
Mr M is the reason my posts have been few and far between.
For one, he has only been sleeping through the night for about a week. And he isn't really sleeping through most nights, but only having a brief waking where I do not have to nurse or rock him (but do have to sit in the room), is WAY better than the 14m prior to this breakthrough. He is not happy about it. Too bad for him.
He and I have also been diagnosed with Neurofibromatosis type 1(NF), which is a genetic and neurological disorder which causes tumours to grow on the nerves. It can be very serious, or so mild you go undiagnosed. It can be a sporadic mutation, which happened to me, or it can be genetically passed down via a parent, which happened to M.
I had no idea I had this condition until M was sent to a paediatrician for the bowing in his left tibia. I had requested a second opinion for our family doctor, was sent to a paediatrician, who took one look at him and sent us to Sick Kids.
3 weeks later we went to Sick Kids. They took one look and said, "Yes, we have to be concerned about this leg, and yes, you need the NF clinic."
2 weeks later (on the evening of S' nursery school Christmas Concert which I have yet to receive photos or videos of), my mom, M and I found ourselves back at Sick Kids in the NF Clinic where we found that M did indeed have NF, and I should get myself into an adult clinic ASAP. ASAP for adults means just last week.
SO, M has had special eye exams, countless doctor's appointments, and finally, physio/occupational therapy, who rushed his leg braces. I am forever grateful for his physiotherapist for getting the ball rolling for us, because Sick Kids had a loong wait time and he has been wonderful with M.
He isn't quite walking yet, but he is getting there. It was hard for him to adjust to socks, braces and shoes all at once, but Mr M is a determined little (big) fellow, and he will get there. He is thisclose. So close. Another month and I will be wondering why I was ever worried about it.
Except that I am always worried. NF can be linked to pseudarthritis, scoliosis and a whole whack of other things, but with his bowed little legs, I worry about what a break could mean for him; and we were warned that a break will likely happen at some point, and he will need surgery then...so let's hope it happens later rather than sooner. OR, we could just hope it doesn't happen at all.
It is not all bad. We are trying to remain optimistic, because we can't raise our son to live in fear or be embarrassed by something out of his control. We tell anyone who asks, regardless of age, why he wears the braces and what they do. Note to parents, it is absolutely OK if your child asks about his legs and braces. It is not something we are ashamed of, and we hope M wont be ashamed of them either. Let your child ask questions, feel free to ask them yourself. Just be prepared for an education about NF and what it causes, because we have even met people in the healthcare profession not familiar with NF and that is not right.
1 in 3,500 babies will be born with NF. It doesn't matter gender or race, NF isn't discriminatory.
Up to 50% of children with NF will have some sort of learning disability or be on the ASD spectrum.
Signs of NF include cafe au lait spots, neurofibromas (little raised tumours/bumps), bowing of the tibia (leg).
It can cause scoliosis, pseudoarthritis, tumours on the eyes.
Parents with NF have a 50% chance of passing it on. S does not have it, M does.
Just a little education. And to be clear, I went 31 years without knowing I had NF. M has the cafe au laits and a bowed tibia (though he wears braces on both legs for a variety of reasons- minor bowing of the right tibia and to better stabilize him as he learns to walk to be the main ones). We can hope that he, like me, will live a normal, healthy life. We are getting genetic testing done so we have as much information as we can, because, quite frankly, there is not enough information out there.
Well, it's late, and I have to curl up with a cup of tea. It feels good writing this out. We've been so busy that I just need to sit and think at the computer sometimes.
No worries, I have posts on our African Adventure and the many milestones of the kiddos to share after we get through Nursery School Graduation, Grade Eight Graduation and a whole slew of parties, weddings and general summer business.
Tuesday, 2 July 2013
My Dear Children
We just celebrated M's first Canada Day with a friend filled weekend. He was exhausted, but relatively well behaved, and Miss S was absolutely pooped by last night, but had so much fun, it was 100% worth it.
My Dear Son,
You are three and a half months old and are quite possibly the sweetest, funniest baby ever. You will gladly go to anyone to be snuggled. You coo and giggle and dole out the biggest smiles. You love raspberries on your tummy and splashing in the bath. We are working on getting you to sleep on your own, because right now (after weeks of blissful, independent sleep I might add), you will only sleep if snuggled in close, which makes you both endearing and exhausting.
Your sisters love you, Miss S especially has a hard time leaving you alone. I can't wait until you are big enough to get into her stuff. Your big brown eyes are going to be your saving grace big boy, because I have a feeling they are going to get you out of (and perhaps into) a lot of trouble.
My Dear Baby (Big) Girl,
You are almost three years old. How did that happen? How has three years passed? You are still my baby girl, even if you do insist that you "aren't my baby, you're my Scarlie!"
You love all things doctor. I foresee medical school in your future, and I truly believe that midwifery or pediatrics is in your future.
You love your brother fiercely. It is the sweetest thing. And your big sister is your shinning star, you are a very loving and affectionate little girl.
You are also too smart for your own good (or for my own good). You amaze me everyday with the new things you learn and share. You know your numbers and letter. You know your colours and shapes (even obscure ones like octagons). You count and sing and sign and I cannot wait for you to go to nursery school and learn even more.
You are my mini-me, my little doll. It is such a joy to watch you grow into the beautiful, intelligent and sweet girl that you are.
Alright my children, nap time is almost over and it's time for a walk. Until next time my loves.
My Dear Son,
You are three and a half months old and are quite possibly the sweetest, funniest baby ever. You will gladly go to anyone to be snuggled. You coo and giggle and dole out the biggest smiles. You love raspberries on your tummy and splashing in the bath. We are working on getting you to sleep on your own, because right now (after weeks of blissful, independent sleep I might add), you will only sleep if snuggled in close, which makes you both endearing and exhausting.
Your sisters love you, Miss S especially has a hard time leaving you alone. I can't wait until you are big enough to get into her stuff. Your big brown eyes are going to be your saving grace big boy, because I have a feeling they are going to get you out of (and perhaps into) a lot of trouble.
My Dear Baby (Big) Girl,
You are almost three years old. How did that happen? How has three years passed? You are still my baby girl, even if you do insist that you "aren't my baby, you're my Scarlie!"
You love all things doctor. I foresee medical school in your future, and I truly believe that midwifery or pediatrics is in your future.
You love your brother fiercely. It is the sweetest thing. And your big sister is your shinning star, you are a very loving and affectionate little girl.
You are also too smart for your own good (or for my own good). You amaze me everyday with the new things you learn and share. You know your numbers and letter. You know your colours and shapes (even obscure ones like octagons). You count and sing and sign and I cannot wait for you to go to nursery school and learn even more.
You are my mini-me, my little doll. It is such a joy to watch you grow into the beautiful, intelligent and sweet girl that you are.
Alright my children, nap time is almost over and it's time for a walk. Until next time my loves.
Monday, 25 March 2013
A Letter To My Son
My Dear Little Boy,
You are nine days old today and you have already captured our hearts. Your sisters adore you (Miss S think of herself as a second mother), your parents are entranced and your grandparents are just in love. You have completed our family and we are so glad that you (finally) decided to make your arrival.
Your birth was highly anticipated. We were waiting...and waiting...Daddy's holidays were almost over and we were STILL WAITING, but finally, on Friday morning, our wonderful midwife called and offered to help get things started.
At bout 10:30am on Friday, March 15, we saw our wonderful midwife Agnes and she preformed a stretch and sweep after receiving a somewhat pleading call from your mommy. Daddy took your sisters out of the house and left mommy to sleep the afternoon away. Grano brought home dinner, and it was then that sporadic contractions began. I didn't think much of them, I knew that it was entirely possible that it was just more false labor.
In fact, I was so sure that I was NOT in labor, that I went shopping to buy a chair for your nursery after putting your sister to bed. Got home, went to bed, but by about 10:30, I had the distinct feeling that it wasn't braxton hicks anymore.
At 11pm I started timing the contractions, then let your dad know that he needed to get upstairs while I got in the tub to see if water slowed things down...it didn't. We let Grano know that labor had started and we'd call when we needed her to come by. Daddy set up the bedroom for your birth. Warm, worn sheets for the bed, soft towels, and enough shower curtains and plastic table cloths to cover the floor.
By 1am mommy said it was time to page Agnes and get Grano. They both arrived around 1:30, just as I told your daddy that he better call Agnes and tell her to page the second midwife.
Sure enough, I was 7cm dilated and Andy, our other midwife, was on her way.
Things are blurry for the next little while as we suffered through contractions while being attached to an IV, which definitely limited mobility! As soon as the IV was done and I could stand, I did, and soon after, there was a gush of water. So different from your sister, with whom labor began with a trickling of water breaking.
The contractions became more intense and it was time to get back onto the bed. Mommy was so happy to be able to push, so excited and eager to meet you my little one.
After 4 pushes, about 20 minutes total, you came screaming out. Literally. We heard you scream the moment your head was out.
It was the most empowering moment. Bringing my beautiful son into the world in the comfort of our home, warm in our bed. Those first moments are so precious, and were made so much more comfortable with the scents, sounds, sights and touches of home surrounding us.
You looked so much like your sister, but so clearly masculine. And bigger, though it wasn't for an hour or so that we found out just how much bigger.
Your sister, born at 41.2 weeks, was 6.15 pounds and 54cm. You, at 41.1weeks weighed a whopping 9.6 pounds and measured at 56cm. Already verging on too big for newborn sizes, but so chubby and beautiful. Your delivery, for such a big boy, was easy. You were meant to be just as you are.
And here we are, 9 days later. Your favourite place to sleep is snuggled in close to me, your sweet baby smell intoxicating me as I sleep. You are snuggly and soft and, if there was ever a "spoiled" boy, it is you. You are always close to someone, always snuggled up.
Welcome to the world my son. We are so happy you are here.
Love and Kisses Always,
Mommy
You are nine days old today and you have already captured our hearts. Your sisters adore you (Miss S think of herself as a second mother), your parents are entranced and your grandparents are just in love. You have completed our family and we are so glad that you (finally) decided to make your arrival.
Your birth was highly anticipated. We were waiting...and waiting...Daddy's holidays were almost over and we were STILL WAITING, but finally, on Friday morning, our wonderful midwife called and offered to help get things started.
At bout 10:30am on Friday, March 15, we saw our wonderful midwife Agnes and she preformed a stretch and sweep after receiving a somewhat pleading call from your mommy. Daddy took your sisters out of the house and left mommy to sleep the afternoon away. Grano brought home dinner, and it was then that sporadic contractions began. I didn't think much of them, I knew that it was entirely possible that it was just more false labor.
In fact, I was so sure that I was NOT in labor, that I went shopping to buy a chair for your nursery after putting your sister to bed. Got home, went to bed, but by about 10:30, I had the distinct feeling that it wasn't braxton hicks anymore.
At 11pm I started timing the contractions, then let your dad know that he needed to get upstairs while I got in the tub to see if water slowed things down...it didn't. We let Grano know that labor had started and we'd call when we needed her to come by. Daddy set up the bedroom for your birth. Warm, worn sheets for the bed, soft towels, and enough shower curtains and plastic table cloths to cover the floor.
By 1am mommy said it was time to page Agnes and get Grano. They both arrived around 1:30, just as I told your daddy that he better call Agnes and tell her to page the second midwife.
Sure enough, I was 7cm dilated and Andy, our other midwife, was on her way.
Things are blurry for the next little while as we suffered through contractions while being attached to an IV, which definitely limited mobility! As soon as the IV was done and I could stand, I did, and soon after, there was a gush of water. So different from your sister, with whom labor began with a trickling of water breaking.
The contractions became more intense and it was time to get back onto the bed. Mommy was so happy to be able to push, so excited and eager to meet you my little one.
After 4 pushes, about 20 minutes total, you came screaming out. Literally. We heard you scream the moment your head was out.
It was the most empowering moment. Bringing my beautiful son into the world in the comfort of our home, warm in our bed. Those first moments are so precious, and were made so much more comfortable with the scents, sounds, sights and touches of home surrounding us.
You looked so much like your sister, but so clearly masculine. And bigger, though it wasn't for an hour or so that we found out just how much bigger.
Your sister, born at 41.2 weeks, was 6.15 pounds and 54cm. You, at 41.1weeks weighed a whopping 9.6 pounds and measured at 56cm. Already verging on too big for newborn sizes, but so chubby and beautiful. Your delivery, for such a big boy, was easy. You were meant to be just as you are.
And here we are, 9 days later. Your favourite place to sleep is snuggled in close to me, your sweet baby smell intoxicating me as I sleep. You are snuggly and soft and, if there was ever a "spoiled" boy, it is you. You are always close to someone, always snuggled up.
Welcome to the world my son. We are so happy you are here.
Love and Kisses Always,
Mommy
Thursday, 14 March 2013
41 weeks (well, almost)
My first pregnancy was pretty glorious come to think of it. Sure, I was overdue, but that, and cankles, were really the only big discomforts. I had some nausea, but nothing bad, trouble sleeping at the end and heartburn, but, pretty tame compared to what other women had gone through. I was lucky.
The reason there have been virtually no posts the pregnancy is because it hasn't been glorious. From the start we had scares and hiccoughs and I have been beyond uncomfortable since about 18 weeks in with painful sciatica.
Yes, pregnancy is wonderful, and it results in a beautiful little baby that I can love and hold forever. That, however, doesn't meant I don't have the right to complain about my discomforts, anxieties and stress over it.
Being 41 weeks pregnant with a toddler SUCKS. Unless you have been 41 weeks pregnant, you have no idea what it is like. Yes, I anticipated making it to, and perhaps going past, my due date once again (Miss S was 9 days late), but I didn't think it would be this far past for the second time.
Have you ever been 41 weeks pregnant and had to put on socks and boots and take the over energized toddler and dog for a walk before they both drive you up the wall?
Have you ever been 41 weeks pregnant and had to climb in and out of an SUV in the winter? Or had to lift a 2 1/2 year old in and out of...well anywhere?
My belly is bulging, my hips and back are aching, the only time I am remotely comfortable is in the tub. I can't even lie down to sleep because of the wicked heartburn and feet that are STILL lodged in my ribs.
But, yes. I do know how lucky I am to have gotten pregnant and made it to term. I know that many women suffer worse, but you know what...I am not them. I am me and I have my own stresses with this pregnancy.
When we had our dating ultrasound at around 10 weeks, we found out that our baby had a fetal gut herniation and were set up with care at Mt Sinai with a specialist. We were sent for IPS testing to rule out other disorders and get all the information we could before meeting with the Sinai people, but that was a month between ultrasounds. A month of wondering if our baby was even viable and what our options were. A month of tears and stress and no sleep. Fortunately, the IPS ultrasound and testing showed that everything was fine. The herniation cleared up on its own and there were no other signs of "defects or disorders." Sinai called and told us not to bother coming in, we carried on as usual.
Our 18-20 weeks ultrasound confirmed that baby was growing well, but that he/she did have a large belly, we are still hoping that doesn't mean a thing.
This was also the time my sciatic nerve started acting up, making it painful to stand, sit, lay, walk or exist. It has not improved.
This was followed by a UTI caused by Group B Strep, something that can cause serious damage to little babies, including, in severe cases, death. It took 2 rounds of treatment to clear it up, and I am still going to be put on IV fluids while in labor...if there is even time for them to kick in. Having a quick labor is great in terms of exhaustion and pain, not so much when you are worried about potentially life saving drugs having enough time (4hrs) to reach your child. Now, yes, I am aware that it is like a 0.1 percent chance of anything going wrong because of GBS, but you know what? I am pregnant, hormonal and feel like every test has come back with negative reviews, so ya, I am stressed about it.
I went from having no worries, to being constantly worried. I am worried about having a baby at home, but equally terrified of having a baby on the side of the road. I am stressed about gestational diabetes, GBS, if the itching rash (which isn't PUPPS) means something bad, and right now, I am stressed about when the hell this baby is going to make his/her appearance because ENOUGH IS ENOUGH I WANT THIS KID OUT OF ME. Is being pregnant and all the aches and pains and worries worth it in the end? Of course. Just because I complain, doesn't mean I am somehow ungrateful to be adding to our family. I don't need reminders that "baby will come when it comes," or how "lucky I am". What I need is support, just like any other mother (pregnant or not).
Oh, and to my husband, who has yet to sit down and discuss any possible names...thanks a heap, it sure makes it easier. I don't even have a name for this child, boy or girl, but let me tell you honey, if you don't come up with something before this baby is born, I am choosing the name because I've had them thought out for MONTHS.
However, a few happier thoughts...
Miss S is still in a crib, which means no escape routes at night. She is potty trained (though in a pull up at night because of the crib). She eats everything, is talking up a storm, knows her letters and numbers and is, for the most part, a doll. Except when she is not. Those moments aren't so fun, like being told, "No, I never ----" (fill in the blank). She has also taken to holding her pee as long as humanly possible until she is about to burst. BUT, she is helpful and friendly and loves just hanging out. I am so excited for her to become a big sister. She helped get the baby's things ready and gave the baby a blanket and a few of her own little toys (but said that she wasn't giving the baby her light, her night night blankie or her books...fair enough).
The reason there have been virtually no posts the pregnancy is because it hasn't been glorious. From the start we had scares and hiccoughs and I have been beyond uncomfortable since about 18 weeks in with painful sciatica.
Yes, pregnancy is wonderful, and it results in a beautiful little baby that I can love and hold forever. That, however, doesn't meant I don't have the right to complain about my discomforts, anxieties and stress over it.
Being 41 weeks pregnant with a toddler SUCKS. Unless you have been 41 weeks pregnant, you have no idea what it is like. Yes, I anticipated making it to, and perhaps going past, my due date once again (Miss S was 9 days late), but I didn't think it would be this far past for the second time.
Have you ever been 41 weeks pregnant and had to put on socks and boots and take the over energized toddler and dog for a walk before they both drive you up the wall?
Have you ever been 41 weeks pregnant and had to climb in and out of an SUV in the winter? Or had to lift a 2 1/2 year old in and out of...well anywhere?
My belly is bulging, my hips and back are aching, the only time I am remotely comfortable is in the tub. I can't even lie down to sleep because of the wicked heartburn and feet that are STILL lodged in my ribs.
But, yes. I do know how lucky I am to have gotten pregnant and made it to term. I know that many women suffer worse, but you know what...I am not them. I am me and I have my own stresses with this pregnancy.
When we had our dating ultrasound at around 10 weeks, we found out that our baby had a fetal gut herniation and were set up with care at Mt Sinai with a specialist. We were sent for IPS testing to rule out other disorders and get all the information we could before meeting with the Sinai people, but that was a month between ultrasounds. A month of wondering if our baby was even viable and what our options were. A month of tears and stress and no sleep. Fortunately, the IPS ultrasound and testing showed that everything was fine. The herniation cleared up on its own and there were no other signs of "defects or disorders." Sinai called and told us not to bother coming in, we carried on as usual.
Our 18-20 weeks ultrasound confirmed that baby was growing well, but that he/she did have a large belly, we are still hoping that doesn't mean a thing.
This was also the time my sciatic nerve started acting up, making it painful to stand, sit, lay, walk or exist. It has not improved.
This was followed by a UTI caused by Group B Strep, something that can cause serious damage to little babies, including, in severe cases, death. It took 2 rounds of treatment to clear it up, and I am still going to be put on IV fluids while in labor...if there is even time for them to kick in. Having a quick labor is great in terms of exhaustion and pain, not so much when you are worried about potentially life saving drugs having enough time (4hrs) to reach your child. Now, yes, I am aware that it is like a 0.1 percent chance of anything going wrong because of GBS, but you know what? I am pregnant, hormonal and feel like every test has come back with negative reviews, so ya, I am stressed about it.
I went from having no worries, to being constantly worried. I am worried about having a baby at home, but equally terrified of having a baby on the side of the road. I am stressed about gestational diabetes, GBS, if the itching rash (which isn't PUPPS) means something bad, and right now, I am stressed about when the hell this baby is going to make his/her appearance because ENOUGH IS ENOUGH I WANT THIS KID OUT OF ME. Is being pregnant and all the aches and pains and worries worth it in the end? Of course. Just because I complain, doesn't mean I am somehow ungrateful to be adding to our family. I don't need reminders that "baby will come when it comes," or how "lucky I am". What I need is support, just like any other mother (pregnant or not).
Oh, and to my husband, who has yet to sit down and discuss any possible names...thanks a heap, it sure makes it easier. I don't even have a name for this child, boy or girl, but let me tell you honey, if you don't come up with something before this baby is born, I am choosing the name because I've had them thought out for MONTHS.
However, a few happier thoughts...
Miss S is still in a crib, which means no escape routes at night. She is potty trained (though in a pull up at night because of the crib). She eats everything, is talking up a storm, knows her letters and numbers and is, for the most part, a doll. Except when she is not. Those moments aren't so fun, like being told, "No, I never ----" (fill in the blank). She has also taken to holding her pee as long as humanly possible until she is about to burst. BUT, she is helpful and friendly and loves just hanging out. I am so excited for her to become a big sister. She helped get the baby's things ready and gave the baby a blanket and a few of her own little toys (but said that she wasn't giving the baby her light, her night night blankie or her books...fair enough).
Thursday, 15 November 2012
Where we are now
It's been a long time, way too long, since I last posted. Here is where we are.
Miss S uses the potty. I don't want to jinx it, but she has been using the potty for a few months, and it has been about a week since she has had any accidents, and about 2 weeks of pooping in the potty, which was our big obstacle. She is wearing big girl underpants, and will often stay dry through naps.
We aren't potty training at night because she is still in her crib, and will be for a few more months...but not long after March because...
Yup, come March we will be joined by Eggo v2.0! A new little peanut to join our family! Miss S is crazy excited. It is the absolute sweetest thing I have ever seen. She talks to my belly and asks/tells/demands the baby to kick. She kisses the baby and is all about lifting up my shirt and saying "Hi" to the baby. Melts my heart.
Also makes me a little nervous because she is very possessive of her mommy. Like to a point when if another child, her own cousin included, comes up and touches me, she runs over yelling, "No! That's my mommy!" I am hoping that once it is "her baby," that she will share "her mommy" because otherwise we are in for a world of tears and tantrums.
Speaking of which...what is up with the tears and tantrums!? They are so unpredictable. One moment we are laughing and dancing, the next we are in total meltdown mode. Often regarding simple request or denial of her on my behalf. The most recent was over apple juice. I asked her if she wanted juice or chocolate milk with her dinner. she replied, "No." So she got apple juice. She took one sip adn burst into tears.
"No juice mama! Chocy nak" (chocolate milk)
"Scarlett, momma asked what you would like to drink."
"Ya. Chocy nak mama." (in a very pathetic, sad, voice)
This was full on tears over something she was offered and refused. I sometimes wish I could get into her head...though a meltdown over chocolate milk makes me rethink that...
We also had our first Halloween outing. In the past, Miss S has stayed home, handed out candy to a few kids, cried, and gone to bed. This year we decided to take her out. We planned on grandma's and two or three neighbors, but she had so much fun that we ended up hitting about 6 houses (grandma's house to our house that were lit up and home). She was yelling "trick or treat" as soon as her feet hit the driveway, but if the "man of the house" was handing out candy, wouldn't say it again, kids and moms got smiles and chats though. Her favourite part of trick or treating? Seeing all of our neighbors dogs/cats. We had to bribe her away from the kitty-cat at one house with the promise of more treats.
It was a rainy Halloween. Miss S carried her umbrella until the first candy bar, then switched for her treat bag, which she held onto with an iron grip.
Let's see...
Little Miss S love "Mickey Mouse Clubhouse" which she calls "Hotdog" after the ending credits, Signing Time/Baby Signing Time/Potty Time (anything with Rachel and Hopkins) is always a easy sell. LOVES Toy Story and is just getting into princesses. She has taken to putting on hairbands, jewelry, purses etc and saying, "Ohhhh! I'm a princess!" Random because we don't talk about the princesses...interesting because it's one of the girliest stereotypes out there, and she is apparently all into it. She also loves "helping mama" which is great when it's sweeping/cleaning, but sometimes a pain when it's cooking. Mixing ingredients, great. Cracking eggs, and wanting to help with the stove/oven...not so much.
Today she did help set the table though, so that's good!
Alright, it is 8:55 on a Thursday night, which means "Must See TV" is about to start. So hopefully I will be able to keep up with the posts a bit more before the new peanut arrives. And also get more pictures. Having an iphone is great, except for the fact that all my pictures are on my phone, not my computer.
Night all.
Miss S uses the potty. I don't want to jinx it, but she has been using the potty for a few months, and it has been about a week since she has had any accidents, and about 2 weeks of pooping in the potty, which was our big obstacle. She is wearing big girl underpants, and will often stay dry through naps.
We aren't potty training at night because she is still in her crib, and will be for a few more months...but not long after March because...
Also makes me a little nervous because she is very possessive of her mommy. Like to a point when if another child, her own cousin included, comes up and touches me, she runs over yelling, "No! That's my mommy!" I am hoping that once it is "her baby," that she will share "her mommy" because otherwise we are in for a world of tears and tantrums.
Speaking of which...what is up with the tears and tantrums!? They are so unpredictable. One moment we are laughing and dancing, the next we are in total meltdown mode. Often regarding simple request or denial of her on my behalf. The most recent was over apple juice. I asked her if she wanted juice or chocolate milk with her dinner. she replied, "No." So she got apple juice. She took one sip adn burst into tears.
"No juice mama! Chocy nak" (chocolate milk)
"Scarlett, momma asked what you would like to drink."
"Ya. Chocy nak mama." (in a very pathetic, sad, voice)
This was full on tears over something she was offered and refused. I sometimes wish I could get into her head...though a meltdown over chocolate milk makes me rethink that...
We also had our first Halloween outing. In the past, Miss S has stayed home, handed out candy to a few kids, cried, and gone to bed. This year we decided to take her out. We planned on grandma's and two or three neighbors, but she had so much fun that we ended up hitting about 6 houses (grandma's house to our house that were lit up and home). She was yelling "trick or treat" as soon as her feet hit the driveway, but if the "man of the house" was handing out candy, wouldn't say it again, kids and moms got smiles and chats though. Her favourite part of trick or treating? Seeing all of our neighbors dogs/cats. We had to bribe her away from the kitty-cat at one house with the promise of more treats.
It was a rainy Halloween. Miss S carried her umbrella until the first candy bar, then switched for her treat bag, which she held onto with an iron grip.
Little Miss S love "Mickey Mouse Clubhouse" which she calls "Hotdog" after the ending credits, Signing Time/Baby Signing Time/Potty Time (anything with Rachel and Hopkins) is always a easy sell. LOVES Toy Story and is just getting into princesses. She has taken to putting on hairbands, jewelry, purses etc and saying, "Ohhhh! I'm a princess!" Random because we don't talk about the princesses...interesting because it's one of the girliest stereotypes out there, and she is apparently all into it. She also loves "helping mama" which is great when it's sweeping/cleaning, but sometimes a pain when it's cooking. Mixing ingredients, great. Cracking eggs, and wanting to help with the stove/oven...not so much.
Today she did help set the table though, so that's good!
Alright, it is 8:55 on a Thursday night, which means "Must See TV" is about to start. So hopefully I will be able to keep up with the posts a bit more before the new peanut arrives. And also get more pictures. Having an iphone is great, except for the fact that all my pictures are on my phone, not my computer.
Night all.
Wednesday, 1 August 2012
I hate the potty...and so does Miss S
I will keep this short because I am ready to tear my hair out over it.
Miss S refuses to potty train. I have tried just plopping her in underpants...they al had to be washed from pee and poop and it didn't really seem to phase her that she was wet/dirty.
I tried bribes of candy and chocolate...no interest. So I tried cookies. No interest. She will plop her little bum down for 2.8 seconds and demand her treat...then scream and cry for more.
I sing songs. I cheer. I sit and go potty with her.
She has zero interest in actually using the potty (though she will sit on it and sing).
She has also taken to telling me that "it's stuck" as soon as she sits on the potty. She makes a face and says, "Ooooooo! It's stuck!" The end. No more trying.
We watch Potty Time. We have the watch. We read potty books. I have tried telling her that she is such a big girl, she doesn't want to wear diapers like a baby! She tells me she wants diapers. I get her new undies and make a big stink about them, she tells me, "No potty in *signs underwear*" Yay! She gets it...except not so much.
I know I am not the only one, but for some reason we are receiving a lot of "Get the 2 year old potty trained" pressure, and I was SURE that by end of summer we'd be done with diapers during the day...SO...back to underpants tomorrow (it was laundry day) and here is hoping that they stay dry.
Miss S refuses to potty train. I have tried just plopping her in underpants...they al had to be washed from pee and poop and it didn't really seem to phase her that she was wet/dirty.
I tried bribes of candy and chocolate...no interest. So I tried cookies. No interest. She will plop her little bum down for 2.8 seconds and demand her treat...then scream and cry for more.
I sing songs. I cheer. I sit and go potty with her.
She has zero interest in actually using the potty (though she will sit on it and sing).
She has also taken to telling me that "it's stuck" as soon as she sits on the potty. She makes a face and says, "Ooooooo! It's stuck!" The end. No more trying.
We watch Potty Time. We have the watch. We read potty books. I have tried telling her that she is such a big girl, she doesn't want to wear diapers like a baby! She tells me she wants diapers. I get her new undies and make a big stink about them, she tells me, "No potty in *signs underwear*" Yay! She gets it...except not so much.
I know I am not the only one, but for some reason we are receiving a lot of "Get the 2 year old potty trained" pressure, and I was SURE that by end of summer we'd be done with diapers during the day...SO...back to underpants tomorrow (it was laundry day) and here is hoping that they stay dry.
Sunday, 15 July 2012
2 Years Later
It has been hard to keep up lately, school is always busy at the end of the year, and with 3 separate birthday celebrations and her cousin's Christening (as well as a concert on Canada Day for mom and dad), Miss S has been busy!
I keep looking at my baby, my toddler, and thinking, "There is no way she is already two years old."
I mean, how the heck is it possible that it has been two years since I held my newborn? 2 years (more now, 2 years and 2 days) since I looked at my pregnant belly convinced I would be pregnant FOREVER. 2 years since my life changed completely and motherhood became my number one priority and job. Of course, Miss K was in my life and my number one, but in a different way. She's my big girl, now practically a teenager, Miss S was the first person to ever be MINE, to be dependent on ME...sometimes it still amazes me.
So, update time.
Miss S talks nonstop. Some of it is still babble, some only the people who see (and hear) her daily can truly understand, but, for the most part, she is nonstop chatter from the moment she opens her eyes until they close for sleep.
She LOVES "Toy Story". LOVES. She got spoiled for her birthday and now has Woody, Jessie and BullsEye as well as a cup and plate, backpack, book/figurines and carrying bag all dedicated to Toy Story. The only thing she MAY like better is Signing Time. We watch one or the other ALL THE TIME. Occasionally I can get her to watch "Tangled," but not for the princess...for the HORSE. And it's usually a hard sell...
She eats everything. Sushi, chili, asparagus (which she actually asked for dessert once), salad, curry. Tomatoes, mushrooms and onions are the only things she will pass on (unless they are in a sauce or soup), otherwise, she is the easiest kid to please (touch wood...please do not let me jinx it).
She RUNS everywhere. She never sits still. She jumps and hops everywhere, off stairs, onto stairs, on and off of rocks, down the hall. She has one speed- SUPER SPEED, and she is either motoring or sleeping. No in between.
She is resisting potty training, but next week I am ditching the diapers and putting on underpants outside and praying that she will prefer the potty to peepee pants. She loves watching Potty Time...just not doing it. OR, she will want to sit on the potty just as I am about to go...and will then sit and sing and kick her legs until I am ready to burst.
She is picking up new words every day, and I am amazed at what comes out of her mouth. Soccer, kick, party, cake...she hears them once and out they come!
She counts to 10...not all the time, she has to be in the mood, and sometimes she skips right to 10 because she likes the sign, but she counts! She will also tell you she is 2 and hold up 2 fingers.
She is learning the ABCs (song and signs) and loves looking for t
I keep looking at my baby, my toddler, and thinking, "There is no way she is already two years old."
I mean, how the heck is it possible that it has been two years since I held my newborn? 2 years (more now, 2 years and 2 days) since I looked at my pregnant belly convinced I would be pregnant FOREVER. 2 years since my life changed completely and motherhood became my number one priority and job. Of course, Miss K was in my life and my number one, but in a different way. She's my big girl, now practically a teenager, Miss S was the first person to ever be MINE, to be dependent on ME...sometimes it still amazes me.
So, update time.
Miss S talks nonstop. Some of it is still babble, some only the people who see (and hear) her daily can truly understand, but, for the most part, she is nonstop chatter from the moment she opens her eyes until they close for sleep.
She LOVES "Toy Story". LOVES. She got spoiled for her birthday and now has Woody, Jessie and BullsEye as well as a cup and plate, backpack, book/figurines and carrying bag all dedicated to Toy Story. The only thing she MAY like better is Signing Time. We watch one or the other ALL THE TIME. Occasionally I can get her to watch "Tangled," but not for the princess...for the HORSE. And it's usually a hard sell...
She eats everything. Sushi, chili, asparagus (which she actually asked for dessert once), salad, curry. Tomatoes, mushrooms and onions are the only things she will pass on (unless they are in a sauce or soup), otherwise, she is the easiest kid to please (touch wood...please do not let me jinx it).
She RUNS everywhere. She never sits still. She jumps and hops everywhere, off stairs, onto stairs, on and off of rocks, down the hall. She has one speed- SUPER SPEED, and she is either motoring or sleeping. No in between.
She is resisting potty training, but next week I am ditching the diapers and putting on underpants outside and praying that she will prefer the potty to peepee pants. She loves watching Potty Time...just not doing it. OR, she will want to sit on the potty just as I am about to go...and will then sit and sing and kick her legs until I am ready to burst.
She is picking up new words every day, and I am amazed at what comes out of her mouth. Soccer, kick, party, cake...she hears them once and out they come!
She counts to 10...not all the time, she has to be in the mood, and sometimes she skips right to 10 because she likes the sign, but she counts! She will also tell you she is 2 and hold up 2 fingers.
She is learning the ABCs (song and signs) and loves looking for t
Tuesday, 8 May 2012
"Catch"up
Wow...it has been a LONG time. I've clearly been busy! I have been back to work more frequently with a part time placement, and what that evidentially means is that I have an abnormally clingy child, yes, I said it, child.
21, now almost 22 months old. 2 years ago I was nearing the end of my pregnancy, only 2 months to go, feeling great (albeit bloated) and eagerly awaiting "Eggo's" arrival.
Let me catch you up.
Miss S is starting to talk... A LOT. She signs most of her words, but she is quickly picking up more and more words every day. Her favourite word is "siiiiiiiide"! There are two versions. "siide" or "ow siide," which means "outside," and "siiiiiiiiiide," which means "slide.
I caved and bought a Little Tykes slide for our yard because Miss S + the "siiiiiiiide" = hours of fun. HOURS. The first day we brought it home she played, and played...actually, to back track, she screamed because I made the mistake of bringing her to go pick the slide up. She kept her hands on it the entire ride home and tried to climb it while we put it together. Then it was time to play...and play... and play. Luckily she can now climb up herself to slide down, because it was a long 2 days while she mastered that skill. Now I can garden or read and have a cup of coffee while she "siiiiiiiiides".
The first evening, after we went in for supper (Miss S screaming and crying), she stood at the window and cried, then sat in her high chair, looking out at her "siiiiide" and cried. I shudder to think of it.
She puts her own boots on, often on the wrong feet, but she puts them on ALL BY HERSELF every time! She brings her little rainbow boots (which she wears ALL THE TIME because they are 'booows" aka rainbow boots, anyways, she brings her little boots to a corner, leans against the wall, and slips her little feet into them.
She puts her hands (and other small objects) into her pockets, coat, sweatshirt and pants pockets. Yes, I have yet another set of pockets to check. Thanks Daddy for teaching her that.
She picks me flowers (dandelions mostly, but they are fabulous flowers to pick out of the lawn).
She signs "I love you," two ways actually.
She sings the chorus to the theme songs for Signing Time, Potty Time and Baby Signing Time and will ask for specific movies of each of these.
She LOVES Toy Story 2 and now has a little plastic Woody and Jessie that she carries around. She says "Toy Story" and asks to watch it...number 2 is her favourite, but she will tolerate the others. Funnily enough, we only ever get to the part in "Toy Story 2" when Woody gets fixed and she gives up, we generally watch the other half later.
Sorry, I know, not an overly exciting post, but man, my kid amazes me. So much has happened, I couldn't even begin to write it all out! She eats hummus, and cabbage. She holds the dog's leash while we walk. She tells (signs for) people to "share' when she wants something and says "tan tee" (thank you) when you give her something.
She is loving and snuggly and just all around wonderful. She recognizes people in pictures, and her new favourite thing is to look at pictures on the iPad (or photo albums) and hear all about the pictures.
Oh, can't forget her new favourite dolly friend. Daddy loves her. She used to be my dolly, Miss S has adopted her and Daddy has named her "Creepy Connie."
Here is why......
I think Connie gets up to mischief in the night because of pile of lonely socks has grown since she has joined our family. Perhaps she is using them for some sort of evil scheme? Or a craft? T seems convinced she is up to no good.
21, now almost 22 months old. 2 years ago I was nearing the end of my pregnancy, only 2 months to go, feeling great (albeit bloated) and eagerly awaiting "Eggo's" arrival.
Let me catch you up.
Miss S is starting to talk... A LOT. She signs most of her words, but she is quickly picking up more and more words every day. Her favourite word is "siiiiiiiide"! There are two versions. "siide" or "ow siide," which means "outside," and "siiiiiiiiiide," which means "slide.
I caved and bought a Little Tykes slide for our yard because Miss S + the "siiiiiiiide" = hours of fun. HOURS. The first day we brought it home she played, and played...actually, to back track, she screamed because I made the mistake of bringing her to go pick the slide up. She kept her hands on it the entire ride home and tried to climb it while we put it together. Then it was time to play...and play... and play. Luckily she can now climb up herself to slide down, because it was a long 2 days while she mastered that skill. Now I can garden or read and have a cup of coffee while she "siiiiiiiiides".
The first evening, after we went in for supper (Miss S screaming and crying), she stood at the window and cried, then sat in her high chair, looking out at her "siiiiide" and cried. I shudder to think of it.
She puts her own boots on, often on the wrong feet, but she puts them on ALL BY HERSELF every time! She brings her little rainbow boots (which she wears ALL THE TIME because they are 'booows" aka rainbow boots, anyways, she brings her little boots to a corner, leans against the wall, and slips her little feet into them.
She puts her hands (and other small objects) into her pockets, coat, sweatshirt and pants pockets. Yes, I have yet another set of pockets to check. Thanks Daddy for teaching her that.
She picks me flowers (dandelions mostly, but they are fabulous flowers to pick out of the lawn).
She signs "I love you," two ways actually.
She sings the chorus to the theme songs for Signing Time, Potty Time and Baby Signing Time and will ask for specific movies of each of these.
She LOVES Toy Story 2 and now has a little plastic Woody and Jessie that she carries around. She says "Toy Story" and asks to watch it...number 2 is her favourite, but she will tolerate the others. Funnily enough, we only ever get to the part in "Toy Story 2" when Woody gets fixed and she gives up, we generally watch the other half later.
Sorry, I know, not an overly exciting post, but man, my kid amazes me. So much has happened, I couldn't even begin to write it all out! She eats hummus, and cabbage. She holds the dog's leash while we walk. She tells (signs for) people to "share' when she wants something and says "tan tee" (thank you) when you give her something.
She is loving and snuggly and just all around wonderful. She recognizes people in pictures, and her new favourite thing is to look at pictures on the iPad (or photo albums) and hear all about the pictures.
Oh, can't forget her new favourite dolly friend. Daddy loves her. She used to be my dolly, Miss S has adopted her and Daddy has named her "Creepy Connie."
Here is why......
I think Connie gets up to mischief in the night because of pile of lonely socks has grown since she has joined our family. Perhaps she is using them for some sort of evil scheme? Or a craft? T seems convinced she is up to no good.
Tuesday, 27 March 2012
Baby's 4 Letter Word
Until I had a toddler, I never thought I would ever tire of hearing the word, “Mama.”
Then my baby became a toddler and started chattering nonstop. The chatter I love. It is so endearing and sweet. The excited, “Mama!” I get when I come home, or the snuggly, “Awwww, Mama,” I get when she comes in for a hug and kiss, I love. What I don’t love so much is the shrill, persistent, “MAMA” I have been hearing for the past week or so.
MAMA!!
Yes baby?
MAMA!! MAMA!!
Yes baby? I’m listening.
Gorgy Mama! Mama! Gogry Mama!
Oh yes, I see.
MAMA!
MAMA!
MAMA!
This will go one for what seems like hours. I cannot simply acknowledge her voice and smile, I must have both eyes on her, both hands empty, and all attention directed at her. Even if she is simply showing me the same picture in the book over and over...or pointing to her socks, shoes, dolly...whatever.
MAMA!! MAMA!
I was putting on a youtube video of laughing babies for her, she thinks it’s funny, but she freaked when I turned to look at the computer to load the video.
MAMA! Daydy Mama! Daaaaaaaydeeeeeeee!!
(Daydy is pronounced like “baby” for those not in the know.)
“Mama” has suddenly become a demand, a very loud, very shrill demand. If I try, I can look on the bright side and think, Well, at least she wants to share every moment, every little thing with me. At lease “Mama” to her means she will be acknowledged and praised.
I would just like to point out to you, baby girl, that “Dada” is just as effective. Particularly when I am in the bathroom or tub.
Tuesday, 20 March 2012
Baby vs University
A girl once barfed in my hair while out with friends...There are some parallels to university and motherhood that I never expected.
It is inevitable that you will not make it through motherhood without being thrown up on at least once. You will also have to wash vomit out of your bed sheets unexpectedly at 3am, and while I never had to wash urine or poop out of my sheets as a university student (but I know people who have...), you will be doing that as well. Often more than once a night.
You will also have vomit in your hair, and it wont be your own.
You will feel overwhelmed sometimes.
You will miss your mom.
In university you are out with your friends. You interact with adults on a regular basis. You drink lattes and discuss current events. You easily pass judgement on the mother with a screaming toddler in Starbucks, rolling your eyes and thinking, "I would never allow my child to behave like that."
In motherhood you occasionally get to go out with friends with babies. The adult interaction you do get is generally to discuss baby paraphernalia...or poop. Or, if you have returned to work, you talk about work...and your baby. You give the mother with the screaming toddler a sympathetic smile as your own toddler throws her sippy cup on the floor and screams for a cookie. You glare at the 20 somethings who don't step aside for the stroller and toddler you are dragging out the door.
Funny how egg meeting sperm can change your life so completely. How someone so small and delicate can make you so strong. How in a moment, your life changes forever and everything before motherhood truly seems so small and far away. Not insignificant, because my university years were anything but, just small. Like a speck in the grand scheme of things because being a "momma" is forever. It is life changing. It is my reason for getting up and going to work, my reason for being a better person.
It is inevitable that you will not make it through motherhood without being thrown up on at least once. You will also have to wash vomit out of your bed sheets unexpectedly at 3am, and while I never had to wash urine or poop out of my sheets as a university student (but I know people who have...), you will be doing that as well. Often more than once a night.
You will also have vomit in your hair, and it wont be your own.
You will feel overwhelmed sometimes.
You will miss your mom.
In university you are out with your friends. You interact with adults on a regular basis. You drink lattes and discuss current events. You easily pass judgement on the mother with a screaming toddler in Starbucks, rolling your eyes and thinking, "I would never allow my child to behave like that."
In motherhood you occasionally get to go out with friends with babies. The adult interaction you do get is generally to discuss baby paraphernalia...or poop. Or, if you have returned to work, you talk about work...and your baby. You give the mother with the screaming toddler a sympathetic smile as your own toddler throws her sippy cup on the floor and screams for a cookie. You glare at the 20 somethings who don't step aside for the stroller and toddler you are dragging out the door.
Funny how egg meeting sperm can change your life so completely. How someone so small and delicate can make you so strong. How in a moment, your life changes forever and everything before motherhood truly seems so small and far away. Not insignificant, because my university years were anything but, just small. Like a speck in the grand scheme of things because being a "momma" is forever. It is life changing. It is my reason for getting up and going to work, my reason for being a better person.
Tuesday, 13 March 2012
20
20 months ago I had a newborn. 20 months...unreal. We currently have a "don't pay for 20 months" plan on our new bedroom furniture, it seemed like a long time when we made the purchase, but suddenly it feels like another 20 months could fly by us once again.
This time last year my baby girl wasn't even crawling yet. She was scooting and rolling, but not crawling, never mind running around the house.
This time last year my baby girl wasn't talking. We had a few signs, but other than "MAMAMAMMAMA" and "DADADADA," no "real" words.
This time last year I was shopping in the baby section, the toddler section of the store seemed like another world. Now I look at what she was wearing this time last year and the little dresses and pants look like doll clothes. How did my baby get so big?
Almost two years have passed since our family went from three to four. Almost two years since we brought our squishy newborn home and rocked to to sleep in my grandfather's cradle. Almost two years of late nights and early mornings; of diapers and car rides; of giggles and tears. It's amazing what 20 months means to me now. It is so significant, we are truly exiting the baby stage and entering toddlerhood. In no time at all we will be leaving toddlerhood behind and will have a preschooler. It's not that far off, because in another 20 months, when we are making our final payment on the furniture we just set up, Miss S will be getting ready to turn FOUR and start school.
20 months of love and snuggles and big baby kisses. I can't wait to see what comes next.
This time last year my baby girl wasn't even crawling yet. She was scooting and rolling, but not crawling, never mind running around the house.
This time last year my baby girl wasn't talking. We had a few signs, but other than "MAMAMAMMAMA" and "DADADADA," no "real" words.
This time last year I was shopping in the baby section, the toddler section of the store seemed like another world. Now I look at what she was wearing this time last year and the little dresses and pants look like doll clothes. How did my baby get so big?
Almost two years have passed since our family went from three to four. Almost two years since we brought our squishy newborn home and rocked to to sleep in my grandfather's cradle. Almost two years of late nights and early mornings; of diapers and car rides; of giggles and tears. It's amazing what 20 months means to me now. It is so significant, we are truly exiting the baby stage and entering toddlerhood. In no time at all we will be leaving toddlerhood behind and will have a preschooler. It's not that far off, because in another 20 months, when we are making our final payment on the furniture we just set up, Miss S will be getting ready to turn FOUR and start school.
20 months of love and snuggles and big baby kisses. I can't wait to see what comes next.
Friday, 2 March 2012
The Sweetest Sound
I feel as though I should give my little darling a more loving, motherly post today, because at 4:30 this morning, I was not feeling motherly. I wasn't even feeling human. Being woken by hysterical screaming that even a big hug and kiss can't fix...SUCKS.
But this is a happy post, because I just spent 20 minutes putting Miss S down. She was snoring in 5, but I couldn't help but hold her close, listening to her stuffy nose snores, feel her warm body in my arms as we rocked in the chair, soft music playing gently in the background. It was one of those movie moments, you know the ones. The moments you see in the movies all too often that make motherhood look easy and give the impression that sleeping like a baby is actually a good thing.
It was the sweetest sound, my baby's breathing, the piano in the background, the soft creak of an old wooden rocking chair. It was one of those moments that made it seem like 4:30am didn't happen. A movie moment that washed away the stress of the day, the ache in my head, the exhaustion in my eyes. These moments are fleeting and it makes me a little sad to think that one day soon, she wont want me to hold her in my arms as she falls asleep. These are the moments that make me grateful for all that I have and all that Miss S is, terrible toddler moments and all.
Night night sweet baby. See you when the sun shines (and not a moment earlier please).
But this is a happy post, because I just spent 20 minutes putting Miss S down. She was snoring in 5, but I couldn't help but hold her close, listening to her stuffy nose snores, feel her warm body in my arms as we rocked in the chair, soft music playing gently in the background. It was one of those movie moments, you know the ones. The moments you see in the movies all too often that make motherhood look easy and give the impression that sleeping like a baby is actually a good thing.
It was the sweetest sound, my baby's breathing, the piano in the background, the soft creak of an old wooden rocking chair. It was one of those moments that made it seem like 4:30am didn't happen. A movie moment that washed away the stress of the day, the ache in my head, the exhaustion in my eyes. These moments are fleeting and it makes me a little sad to think that one day soon, she wont want me to hold her in my arms as she falls asleep. These are the moments that make me grateful for all that I have and all that Miss S is, terrible toddler moments and all.
Night night sweet baby. See you when the sun shines (and not a moment earlier please).
Thursday, 1 March 2012
Terrible Toddlers
Yesterday I was thisclose to trading in Miss S for a newer, less whiney model. I think she is defective, as though at 19 months my sweet, easy going baby's warranty is up and I am now stuck with a whiney, screeching, temperamental toddler. Anyways I can rewind to a month ago when screaming fits of rage were uncommon as opposed to unpredictable?
She had a meltdown over a pencil. That's right, a PENCIL. Not a crayon, marker, cookie...a stupid pencil. 10 minutes of screaming in the corner over a PENCIL.
Then over not wanting to sit in her high chair to eat, like to a point where we thought she was going to be sick.
Or over wanting to take her PJs off.
Or wanting to stand up in the tub.
Another popsicle.
To sit in the stroller.
To get out of the stroller.
To go for a walk.
To go back to the house.
To sit on a chair.
To have a(nother) sucker.
Those are the few things that come to mind when I think of the meltdown's in the past 72 hours...keep in mind that she was upset over the same thing on multiple occasions.
OK...say it with me...LML...
And, just so as not to end this on such a negative note...there are some pretty Terrific Toddler moments too. No need to fret mommas. they are sweet too. Especially when they,
Say new words
Point out colours, shapes, letters and animals for you
Give kisses and hugs
Chatter away
Sit on the potty
Help clean the house
Sleep through the night
Oh wait, that last one doesn't apply to us lately. Well, that's not entirely true, but waking up before the sun is up is growing old very quickly. I am having visions of being up at 5am once the clocks change.
Anyone know where to get one of those clocks that tells kids when it's ok to wake up the rest of the house? Better yet, how can I remind her that 7:30-7:30 is the ideal sleep pattern. What happened to those days? We went MONTHS on that schedule, sometimes as far as 7-8. I swear to all things holy that if my child starts sleeping till 7am straight through again, I will never complain about her sleeping ever again.
I mean really, I thought that naps equaled good nights? Lately we have been having great naps (touch wood, please don't let that have jinxed today), and early mornings. BUT, if I wake her up early form a nap, we usually have restless nights...I am telling you, it's a conspiracy against us parents on behalf of the babies of the world. It's like they have all gotten together and decided that JUST when we think we are in the clear and will be getting a full night's sleep, they will throw us for a loop. Let me tell you, it's a good thing she's cute, because I am very close to hitting my limit...too bad that she'll be able to push me right over the edge...there's no trading her in now.
She had a meltdown over a pencil. That's right, a PENCIL. Not a crayon, marker, cookie...a stupid pencil. 10 minutes of screaming in the corner over a PENCIL.
Then over not wanting to sit in her high chair to eat, like to a point where we thought she was going to be sick.
Or over wanting to take her PJs off.
Or wanting to stand up in the tub.
Another popsicle.
To sit in the stroller.
To get out of the stroller.
To go for a walk.
To go back to the house.
To sit on a chair.
To have a(nother) sucker.
Those are the few things that come to mind when I think of the meltdown's in the past 72 hours...keep in mind that she was upset over the same thing on multiple occasions.
OK...say it with me...LML...
And, just so as not to end this on such a negative note...there are some pretty Terrific Toddler moments too. No need to fret mommas. they are sweet too. Especially when they,
Say new words
Point out colours, shapes, letters and animals for you
Give kisses and hugs
Chatter away
Sit on the potty
Help clean the house
Sleep through the night
Oh wait, that last one doesn't apply to us lately. Well, that's not entirely true, but waking up before the sun is up is growing old very quickly. I am having visions of being up at 5am once the clocks change.
Anyone know where to get one of those clocks that tells kids when it's ok to wake up the rest of the house? Better yet, how can I remind her that 7:30-7:30 is the ideal sleep pattern. What happened to those days? We went MONTHS on that schedule, sometimes as far as 7-8. I swear to all things holy that if my child starts sleeping till 7am straight through again, I will never complain about her sleeping ever again.
I mean really, I thought that naps equaled good nights? Lately we have been having great naps (touch wood, please don't let that have jinxed today), and early mornings. BUT, if I wake her up early form a nap, we usually have restless nights...I am telling you, it's a conspiracy against us parents on behalf of the babies of the world. It's like they have all gotten together and decided that JUST when we think we are in the clear and will be getting a full night's sleep, they will throw us for a loop. Let me tell you, it's a good thing she's cute, because I am very close to hitting my limit...too bad that she'll be able to push me right over the edge...there's no trading her in now.
Saturday, 25 February 2012
It's the Little Things
It's the little things that mean the most. Seeing the world through a toddler's eyes is a remarkable thing. You remember how much fun the little things can be.
Today hasn't been an overly exciting day for me. Sure, we went shopping and out for dinner, but nothing made me clap my hands and laugh the way she did over the little things.
A box of crayons and a piece of paper, the best toys money can buy, extra points if the crayons are someone else's and come in a cup instead of a box.
A cardboard box. I forgot how many things a box can become! A chair, a table, a set of drums, a hiding place...the possibilities are endless, as is the fun!
Socks, putting them on your feet, hands and saying the word...socks are fun when you're 19 months old.
Listening to the same song for the hundredth time. Every time she will laugh and clap in excitement.
Jumping. Jumping is fun when you are 19 months old, especially if mommy jumps too. Ditto for running around the house.
Tupperware. On a daily basis tupperware becomes a boat, a car, a cup, a drum... empty tupperware is almost as much fun as an empty box.
Bubbles. Blowing them or playing in them in the bath. Eating them, splashing them...bubbles are fun.
Finding a penny and putting it in her piggy bank. She found a quarter at Leon's today and was so excited, you would have thought it was a toy or piece of candy.
The little things that she sees everyday, the ones that don't cost a thing (or cost very little); the familiar things that we as adults pay little or no notice too, are what makes a toddler's day fulfilled. I would love to be able to feel the excitement over the little things the same way she does. Seeing her enjoy the little things makes me appreciate them all the more. I think everyone should spend an afternoon with a 19 month old and learn to appreciate snowflakes and slush, rocks and stickers, pennies and crayons. It's a wonderful thing to see the joy the little things bring.
Today hasn't been an overly exciting day for me. Sure, we went shopping and out for dinner, but nothing made me clap my hands and laugh the way she did over the little things.
A box of crayons and a piece of paper, the best toys money can buy, extra points if the crayons are someone else's and come in a cup instead of a box.
A cardboard box. I forgot how many things a box can become! A chair, a table, a set of drums, a hiding place...the possibilities are endless, as is the fun!
Socks, putting them on your feet, hands and saying the word...socks are fun when you're 19 months old.
Listening to the same song for the hundredth time. Every time she will laugh and clap in excitement.
Jumping. Jumping is fun when you are 19 months old, especially if mommy jumps too. Ditto for running around the house.
Tupperware. On a daily basis tupperware becomes a boat, a car, a cup, a drum... empty tupperware is almost as much fun as an empty box.
Bubbles. Blowing them or playing in them in the bath. Eating them, splashing them...bubbles are fun.
Finding a penny and putting it in her piggy bank. She found a quarter at Leon's today and was so excited, you would have thought it was a toy or piece of candy.
The little things that she sees everyday, the ones that don't cost a thing (or cost very little); the familiar things that we as adults pay little or no notice too, are what makes a toddler's day fulfilled. I would love to be able to feel the excitement over the little things the same way she does. Seeing her enjoy the little things makes me appreciate them all the more. I think everyone should spend an afternoon with a 19 month old and learn to appreciate snowflakes and slush, rocks and stickers, pennies and crayons. It's a wonderful thing to see the joy the little things bring.
Miss S admiring the snow...and eating it too...
Friday, 17 February 2012
Special Report
Yesterday after work, Miss S wanted to colour (which she shared by signing colour and bringing me markers). I grabbed her crayons and paper and put her in her high chair, where she sat for a good 45 minutes, even after Grano showed up!
Anyway...
She was colouring and I was singing The Colours of the Rainbow while showing her all the colours. I sat down with my hubby at the table when she holds up a purple crayon. I say and sign, "Purple," to which she responds by signing and saying, "Purpaaal." Not once, but twice in a row. We shrieked and clapped and repeated it to her. She proceeded to whisper it, I think we freaked her out a bit, but it was a perfect "purple." *Tear* Such a proud momma moment!
These first words are so much fun. I love (almost) every spoken word. Unless it comes at 2am, then...not so much. What makes me say this you ask? Well, for a week my darling daughter has been up in the dead of night. A few nights ago I was triumphant when we heard her calling, "Dada! Daaaaadaaaaa!!! DaaaDAA!"
"She wants you."
"I KNOW."
Win for mommy.
Until the next night when we hear a VERY loud and demanding, "Mama!! Maaaamaaaa! MaaaMAA!"
"She wants you."
"I KNOW."
You know when hearing "Mama" isn't nice? At 2:30 in the morning. The only thing I want to hear at 2:30 in the morning is...the wind in the trees, crickets...nothing. I want to hear nothing because I want to be asleep.
Luckily last night we only had a brief midnight waking where neither parent was called to her room for snuggles. In fact, neither parent even went in to check in when she started making noise because midnight is way past our bedtime and after a week of being up all night, short of a fire, we weren't getting out of bed. In all honesty I don't know who fell back asleep first, her or me, all I know is that she called me in at 6:30, which I can deal with. It was a big joke to her though.
"Mama. *giggle, giggle, squeal* Mama!"
I go in, "Shhh...morning baby."
Response I get, "Hi. *sniff, sniff* blah."
I don't know why. Maybe I had morning breath. I checked her diaper. No mess, but she sniffed a few more times before snuggling in for another 45 minutes. Good morning. It must have been all that talking she did yesterday.
Anyway...
She was colouring and I was singing The Colours of the Rainbow while showing her all the colours. I sat down with my hubby at the table when she holds up a purple crayon. I say and sign, "Purple," to which she responds by signing and saying, "Purpaaal." Not once, but twice in a row. We shrieked and clapped and repeated it to her. She proceeded to whisper it, I think we freaked her out a bit, but it was a perfect "purple." *Tear* Such a proud momma moment!
These first words are so much fun. I love (almost) every spoken word. Unless it comes at 2am, then...not so much. What makes me say this you ask? Well, for a week my darling daughter has been up in the dead of night. A few nights ago I was triumphant when we heard her calling, "Dada! Daaaaadaaaaa!!! DaaaDAA!"
"She wants you."
"I KNOW."
Win for mommy.
Until the next night when we hear a VERY loud and demanding, "Mama!! Maaaamaaaa! MaaaMAA!"
"She wants you."
"I KNOW."
You know when hearing "Mama" isn't nice? At 2:30 in the morning. The only thing I want to hear at 2:30 in the morning is...the wind in the trees, crickets...nothing. I want to hear nothing because I want to be asleep.
Luckily last night we only had a brief midnight waking where neither parent was called to her room for snuggles. In fact, neither parent even went in to check in when she started making noise because midnight is way past our bedtime and after a week of being up all night, short of a fire, we weren't getting out of bed. In all honesty I don't know who fell back asleep first, her or me, all I know is that she called me in at 6:30, which I can deal with. It was a big joke to her though.
"Mama. *giggle, giggle, squeal* Mama!"
I go in, "Shhh...morning baby."
Response I get, "Hi. *sniff, sniff* blah."
I don't know why. Maybe I had morning breath. I checked her diaper. No mess, but she sniffed a few more times before snuggling in for another 45 minutes. Good morning. It must have been all that talking she did yesterday.
Monday, 13 February 2012
19 months...another step closer to 2
Today my baby is 19 months old. I can't even believe it. 19 months did not get off to a good start. I was literally up at 19 months to the minute to when she was born. It was a long night...followed by a long day since Miss S was in no mood to nap alone. She spent her nap in my bed clutching to me. Let's hope tonight is not a repeat.
I honestly don't know where to begin. The past month alone has flown by, let's face it, my baby is closer to 2yrs old than 1yr old. We are in a totally different age bracket. 18-24 months. Practically out of the baby department and into the toddler/girl department. Yikes.
There are still "baby flashbacks" though. Lots of them actually, and I cherish each one.
While we do have words (even if we are the only ones that understand them), we still have lots of baby babble, and gosh is that priceless. She will literally babble on, laugh and keep going like, "Do you get it Momma? Aren't I funny?!"
Whenever she nurses, closes her eyes and snuggles in close, I remember my sweet newborn. She sweet, warm breath on my skin brings back all those new mom, newborn, head over heels in love memories.
When she takes my hand to walk up or down the stairs, I remember not so long ago when I had to hold her hands to help her walk.
Every step takes her further into toddlerhood and away from being my little baby. If I am being honest, each step brings her closer to being a real little girl. I look at her sometimes I think that I can't get rid of her bangs because then she really will look like a little girl. She's so tall that she often gets mistaken for older than she is.
PS- that makes buying pants a PAIN. They are either the right length but HUGE in the waist, or they are flood pants. Thank God for babylegs and cloth diapers, one to add length to her pants, the other to add a little booty.
Will I ever stop being amazed at how fast she grows? She takes my breath away. My heart beats a little faster when I think about how in two short years she will be going to school. All day, every day, away from me. Reading, writing, making friends, having sleepovers. For now I will just cherish sticky baby kisses and bear hugs. I will cherish the (very) early morning (or late night) snuggles and remember that they truly wont last forever, because sooner than I 'd like to admit, it wont be "cool" to hold hands and give countless hugs and kisses anytime, anywhere. Soon she wont need, or want, my snuggles to fall asleep, or even in the early morning light before we start our day. 19 months ago I was holding my newborn in my arms, never imagining the amazing little girl she would become. 19 months ago I was the mother of a newborn baby girl, tiny and squishy and totally dependent on me. 19 months ago I became a mother and realized what it felt like to truly love; I realized what it was to have a piece of myself, a piece of my heart, in my arms.
So, while last night and this morning...and this afternoon, I had to keep thinking of LML moments to keep from crying for lack of sleep, at this moment, sitting by myself, enjoying the quiet, I am reminded how lucky I am for every motherhood moment, the easy and the hard (though the easy are more fun). I am so fortunate to have not only my beautiful baby girl, but my beautiful big girl, and am so grateful that my girls are surrounded by love. 19 months ago my family went to sleep as a family of four. We were forever changed by a tiny bundle of pink who still fills our days with laughter and love. Happy 19 months my little Petunia Picklebottom. Momma loves you.
I honestly don't know where to begin. The past month alone has flown by, let's face it, my baby is closer to 2yrs old than 1yr old. We are in a totally different age bracket. 18-24 months. Practically out of the baby department and into the toddler/girl department. Yikes.
There are still "baby flashbacks" though. Lots of them actually, and I cherish each one.
While we do have words (even if we are the only ones that understand them), we still have lots of baby babble, and gosh is that priceless. She will literally babble on, laugh and keep going like, "Do you get it Momma? Aren't I funny?!"
Whenever she nurses, closes her eyes and snuggles in close, I remember my sweet newborn. She sweet, warm breath on my skin brings back all those new mom, newborn, head over heels in love memories.
When she takes my hand to walk up or down the stairs, I remember not so long ago when I had to hold her hands to help her walk.
Every step takes her further into toddlerhood and away from being my little baby. If I am being honest, each step brings her closer to being a real little girl. I look at her sometimes I think that I can't get rid of her bangs because then she really will look like a little girl. She's so tall that she often gets mistaken for older than she is.
PS- that makes buying pants a PAIN. They are either the right length but HUGE in the waist, or they are flood pants. Thank God for babylegs and cloth diapers, one to add length to her pants, the other to add a little booty.
Will I ever stop being amazed at how fast she grows? She takes my breath away. My heart beats a little faster when I think about how in two short years she will be going to school. All day, every day, away from me. Reading, writing, making friends, having sleepovers. For now I will just cherish sticky baby kisses and bear hugs. I will cherish the (very) early morning (or late night) snuggles and remember that they truly wont last forever, because sooner than I 'd like to admit, it wont be "cool" to hold hands and give countless hugs and kisses anytime, anywhere. Soon she wont need, or want, my snuggles to fall asleep, or even in the early morning light before we start our day. 19 months ago I was holding my newborn in my arms, never imagining the amazing little girl she would become. 19 months ago I was the mother of a newborn baby girl, tiny and squishy and totally dependent on me. 19 months ago I became a mother and realized what it felt like to truly love; I realized what it was to have a piece of myself, a piece of my heart, in my arms.
So, while last night and this morning...and this afternoon, I had to keep thinking of LML moments to keep from crying for lack of sleep, at this moment, sitting by myself, enjoying the quiet, I am reminded how lucky I am for every motherhood moment, the easy and the hard (though the easy are more fun). I am so fortunate to have not only my beautiful baby girl, but my beautiful big girl, and am so grateful that my girls are surrounded by love. 19 months ago my family went to sleep as a family of four. We were forever changed by a tiny bundle of pink who still fills our days with laughter and love. Happy 19 months my little Petunia Picklebottom. Momma loves you.
Monday, 6 February 2012
Pieces of Me
Becoming a mother is a lot like when the Grinch learns the true meaning of Christmas, but worse.
You know how the Grinch looks down and sees all the Whos singing and his heart grows three sizes? That's what happens when you become a mother...but imagine that the part of your heart that grew three sizes now lives outside of your body.
Being a mother means that a part of your heart, the part essential to living, is running around the world getting into mischief, getting bonked and bruised, crying, laughing and, in a nutshell, adding more than one grey hair to your head.
Being a mother means that every time your baby falls down, gets a bump or bruise or cries, your heart aches. It physically hurts my heart to see my baby in any pain, to even think about anyone ever hurting her is enough to make me ill.
On the flip side, my heart aches in my chest ( and I think my uterus joins in) whenever she meets a new milestone. Every smile and giggle, every time she claps her hands and jumps up and down in excitement, every time she says, "Mama," and gives me a big hug and kiss, my heart skips a beat. My heart quickens in my chest at my little piece of me laughing and dancing around the kitchen. I can literally feel my heart pounding in my chest, like it is trying to work harder to convey the love I have for the piece of my heart living on the outside.
It's a funny thing, motherhood. You spend 40+ weeks (41+ weeks in my case), waiting for that little baby to be born, never knowing that when your baby exits your body and enters the world, she will take a piece of your heart with her. When she is crying at 2 am, your heart (and let's face it, sanity) is crying with her...what could have happened to break her little heart?? (No, seriously, what? WHAT happened?)
When she runs up to you laughing and giving kisses, your heart knows, even if she can't tell you the words, that she loves you completely, that she trusts and needs you...and that you need her too. After all, you can't live without your heart, especially the piece on the outside.
You know how the Grinch looks down and sees all the Whos singing and his heart grows three sizes? That's what happens when you become a mother...but imagine that the part of your heart that grew three sizes now lives outside of your body.
Being a mother means that a part of your heart, the part essential to living, is running around the world getting into mischief, getting bonked and bruised, crying, laughing and, in a nutshell, adding more than one grey hair to your head.
Being a mother means that every time your baby falls down, gets a bump or bruise or cries, your heart aches. It physically hurts my heart to see my baby in any pain, to even think about anyone ever hurting her is enough to make me ill.
On the flip side, my heart aches in my chest ( and I think my uterus joins in) whenever she meets a new milestone. Every smile and giggle, every time she claps her hands and jumps up and down in excitement, every time she says, "Mama," and gives me a big hug and kiss, my heart skips a beat. My heart quickens in my chest at my little piece of me laughing and dancing around the kitchen. I can literally feel my heart pounding in my chest, like it is trying to work harder to convey the love I have for the piece of my heart living on the outside.
It's a funny thing, motherhood. You spend 40+ weeks (41+ weeks in my case), waiting for that little baby to be born, never knowing that when your baby exits your body and enters the world, she will take a piece of your heart with her. When she is crying at 2 am, your heart (and let's face it, sanity) is crying with her...what could have happened to break her little heart?? (No, seriously, what? WHAT happened?)
When she runs up to you laughing and giving kisses, your heart knows, even if she can't tell you the words, that she loves you completely, that she trusts and needs you...and that you need her too. After all, you can't live without your heart, especially the piece on the outside.
Wednesday, 1 February 2012
One Word
Time again for One Word Wednesday! I will start with a brief (well, as brief as I can be) prelude.
Miss S is obsessed with our new iPad. Particularly with the Pierre talking Parrot app. Basically, Pierre repeats what you say in a funny parrot voice. You can throw tomatoes at him, hit him, pat him, smash him with cymbals, and best of all...it's free. Baby girl loves it. As soon as she wakes up she asks to play. If she sees a computer, she asks to play. Basically, she wants to play with Pierre all day long. Here is her with her most pitiful, sad puppy dog face...
Miss S is obsessed with our new iPad. Particularly with the Pierre talking Parrot app. Basically, Pierre repeats what you say in a funny parrot voice. You can throw tomatoes at him, hit him, pat him, smash him with cymbals, and best of all...it's free. Baby girl loves it. As soon as she wakes up she asks to play. If she sees a computer, she asks to play. Basically, she wants to play with Pierre all day long. Here is her with her most pitiful, sad puppy dog face...
P-p-p-puh-leeeeeeease!
Monday, 30 January 2012
Oh the Joys.
There are several things about motherhood I didn't expect.
10. Goldfish, Cheerios, raisins and other small food bits in my bra. How do they get there?
9. Oven mitts under my bed. Yes, under my bed. I did not put them there.
8. Signing Time/Baby Signing Time/Potty Time music and DVDs on throughout the day. For every daily activity from "potty" to eating to getting dressed, I sing a Rachel Coleman song.
7. Kid music in the car. Every time.
6. Never getting to use the iPad because of a certain someone's obsession. Plus, she works it better than I do anyways. Seriously, she gets multiple apps on the go and flips back and forth between them. Even the blue shirts at the Apple store couldn't figure it out.
5. Toys that sing, bang and light up. Used only when I already have a headache.
4. Traveling with various treats, clothes and entertainment items...enough for an army, just so I can go to the grocery store.
3. Boogers and sticky hands wiped on my pants. Usually done as I am walking out the door to work.
2. My make-up is now for play. I put it on, she puts it on...then "dusts" the furniture with my brushes.
1. Using the potty and brushing teeth EVERY TIME we see the bathroom. EVERY.TIME.
Alright, I know it's not all sunshine and lollipops, but being a mommy to a toddler is fabulous at the best and infuriating at the worst.
Seriously. Shrieking, loudly. Demanding, repeatedly. Temper tantrums make me want to scream and bang MY head on the floor.
How the heck to you reason with an 18 month old? We have time outs, "reasoning", distractions...and often, just walking away and letting her work it out. This is usually done in front of people. Like she saves up all her fusspot moments for company. Or, if she has been with GranO for the day, for me. She will be an "angel" all day. Sweet and funny, helpful and easy going. Then I walk through the door and she stamps her feet and screams for attention, treats and basically to have her way RIGHT NOW.
OK, OK, bright side: she does coming running at me with hugs and kisses. She holds my hand and snuggles in close. She waves at the door as I walk/drive up the driveway. It's not all bad, in fact, it's mostly wonderful, but on some days, when I have been chasing kindergarteners around all day and just want to sit with my feet up, it feels like she is ten times as needy as usual. It's hard to balance everything. Motherhood, being a wife, having a career, keeping the house clean. Work never ends. Thank God for good TV and wine.
10. Goldfish, Cheerios, raisins and other small food bits in my bra. How do they get there?
9. Oven mitts under my bed. Yes, under my bed. I did not put them there.
8. Signing Time/Baby Signing Time/Potty Time music and DVDs on throughout the day. For every daily activity from "potty" to eating to getting dressed, I sing a Rachel Coleman song.
7. Kid music in the car. Every time.
6. Never getting to use the iPad because of a certain someone's obsession. Plus, she works it better than I do anyways. Seriously, she gets multiple apps on the go and flips back and forth between them. Even the blue shirts at the Apple store couldn't figure it out.
5. Toys that sing, bang and light up. Used only when I already have a headache.
4. Traveling with various treats, clothes and entertainment items...enough for an army, just so I can go to the grocery store.
3. Boogers and sticky hands wiped on my pants. Usually done as I am walking out the door to work.
2. My make-up is now for play. I put it on, she puts it on...then "dusts" the furniture with my brushes.
1. Using the potty and brushing teeth EVERY TIME we see the bathroom. EVERY.TIME.
Alright, I know it's not all sunshine and lollipops, but being a mommy to a toddler is fabulous at the best and infuriating at the worst.
Seriously. Shrieking, loudly. Demanding, repeatedly. Temper tantrums make me want to scream and bang MY head on the floor.
How the heck to you reason with an 18 month old? We have time outs, "reasoning", distractions...and often, just walking away and letting her work it out. This is usually done in front of people. Like she saves up all her fusspot moments for company. Or, if she has been with GranO for the day, for me. She will be an "angel" all day. Sweet and funny, helpful and easy going. Then I walk through the door and she stamps her feet and screams for attention, treats and basically to have her way RIGHT NOW.
OK, OK, bright side: she does coming running at me with hugs and kisses. She holds my hand and snuggles in close. She waves at the door as I walk/drive up the driveway. It's not all bad, in fact, it's mostly wonderful, but on some days, when I have been chasing kindergarteners around all day and just want to sit with my feet up, it feels like she is ten times as needy as usual. It's hard to balance everything. Motherhood, being a wife, having a career, keeping the house clean. Work never ends. Thank God for good TV and wine.
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